Time for some Time

Time: Nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Vacation Time: A parallel universe developed by humans that dares nature to make everything happen at once.

What the heck!  Let's go on vacation, what is the worst that can happen while we are gone? [Actually nothing very bad happened, but it could have you know]

We dared the fates.  We scheduled two whole consecutive weeks for vacation.  

Summer is the busiest time for Sue - other than Advent/Christmas... and also Easter is very busy.  Come to think of it, she is busy planning for Christmas in the Spring, and busy planning for the summer camps in the winter and busy planning for Easter at Christmas... What the heck! Let's go on vacation!

Sue had the proverbial full plate.  She seriously contemplated skipping the 1st week of our vacation so she could do some more work.  Doesn't sound like a good idea to me, but then again, I was not asked.  She had finished 4 consecutive weeks of day camps where one day the wheels almost came off the church bus (literally literally) because the servicing dealership forgot to tighten the lug nuts after rotating the tires. Whoops! We just killed 9 church kids.  It didn't happen - but it could have you know.  Then it was right on to VBS.  Her secretary screwed up registration and paper work.  Once the registration mess was sorted out, the week went pretty well.  Not even getting the helium-filled 4 ft motorized clown fish balloon stuck way up on the sanctuary ceiling was too much of a problem.  Then it was time to fire her secretary (for a number of reasons) - but only after more long hours documenting and filling out secretary's "failure to meet expectations".  Human Remains Dept. told her what was needed to be done before the firing (since they know about this sort of thing); but when it came time to lower the boom, HR said I'll just watch to see if you do it right, this is really your job (I am thinking if you know so much about the proper procedure, why don't you be the one?).  Then it was time for another camp of her own design, mixing kids with residents of an elderly care facility for a week.  That camp went really well.  Sue was actually thinking about sticking around 107 degree Dallas for another week (because this was so much fun) - but I repeat myself.
What the heck!  Let's go on vacation anyway.

While we were cruising through barren stretches of the Great Northwest Inland Empire, she was fielding 2-3 call a day from a boy scout who decided to do his Eagle Scout project all-of-a-sudden in one of her Sunday School classrooms.  He had to have it done by end of August.  [Isn't a boy scout supposed to be prepared?]  Then come the calls from the secretaries filling in for the one who is no longer employed, "What does this mean? Can you explain it to me?"  "I don't understand how this is supposed to work."
Meanwhile back in the Oil Patch; my 6-week simple effort to get 14 people to sign 2 pieces of paper and send them back in the provided SASE was dragging on and on.  Anything but simple.  The last signature page arrives at noon on the Friday before vacation.  We have only 6 months before our gas well lease expires, and these folks take 1 1/2 of those 6 months (25% of time wasted) to sign a paper?  Nothing like a scheduled vacation to make the final paper come in, thus requiring much final effort to process the package of legal documents in my final work hours.

Then I get calls from the partners, "Hey, what's happening with that well?  We are running out of time - better do something quick!"  Sorry, I am on vacation.  I'll get to it in 2 weeks.

"URGENT: Immediate Relocation" reads the email on my phone during the first days of vacation.  The building management has decided to move all tenants off of floors 3 through 6 in your building.  Sunstone Exploration, Inc. is in Suite 305. I call and say, "Sorry, I am on vacation, I'll deal with this when I return."  Then the mineral interest owner in the afore mentioned gas well calls, "Our FedEx package to Sunstone Exploration has been returned!  Why doesn't some one sign for it?"  Because I am on vacation and there is no one there to sign for it, until I return.  So sorry, but I am on vacation.

It was a heck of a vacation.  Film at 11.